30 Day Intentional Communication Challenge
My name is Cynthia Kane and I believe that by changing the way you communicate you can change your life.
I’m the bestselling author of How to Communicate Like a Buddhist and Talk to Yourself Like a Buddhist, a certified meditation and mindfulness instructor, and the founder of the Intentional Communication Institute. I’ve taught thousands through my online courses, workshops, and training program how to change the way they communicate. My hope is to help you kickstart a new way of communicating with this 30 Day Communication Challenge and I’ll be with you every step of the way!
I’ll start right out and say that I used to be a horrible communicator. I was extremely passive aggressive, very judgmental, and thought that other people should know what I was thinking and feeling without me being able to express it. And if someone asked me what I wanted – I couldn’t answer directly – I’d ask them what they wanted. I had a lot of fear around expressing myself so much so that I would bottle everything up inside and explode and lash out at the worst moments. I blamed most everyone and everything for what didn’t seem to be going right in my life and I would make excuses and lie around my behavior. I felt very uncomfortable in silence which led to nervous babbling just to fill the air. I had the feeling that nothing I said would be heard in the way I meant it – my facial expressions were different than the words coming out of my mouth at times. And I couldn’t handle confrontation – or criticism of any kind – it would lead me to spend days beating myself up and thinking I was the worst person in the world. I’d shut down – not able to listen to anyone. I didn’t know what to say in uncomfortable situations – telling myself I want to say the right thing, but feeling so hopeless in how to respond. And you know, I was tired, exhausted really at wanting my relationships to be different and not understanding what it was that was making them so hard, painful, reactionary, isolating.
I’m telling you all this because this was where I started. And while this was a hard place to start from, it also meant that I had the most to gain by changing my communication habits. The fact that you’ve opted in to this 30-day Communication Challenge means that you too are ready to make a change. You want to learn how to communicate so that it feels good to you, so that you interact with others in a way that leaves you feeling satisfied and calm. You want to learn how to articulate yourself, knowing that you are capable of meeting your own needs. Maybe you want to learn how to more accurately say what you mean and express how you feel, or maybe you’re looking to mend old relationships, begin new ones, or you’re interested in learning how to handle difficult conversations – how to keep a disagreement from getting ugly and talk gently with people who have radically different views than you. How to express your truth without making the other person defensive. Maybe you’ve realized that the way you’ve been interacting with others needs to change, and you want a starter guide, basic practices you can take to change your communication style now.
You want to communicate better and to do that it’s not enough to hope that it happens or want it to happen. It’s not enough to rely on your instincts instead it takes conscious effort. I wanted my interactions to change for a very long time but it wasn’t until I started practicing a new way of communicating that things began to shift.
Signing up for the 30 Day Intentional Communication Challenge is the first step in creating more confidence, connection, and ease within your interactions.